Finding Balance, Diary entry Jan 27

Jan 27

I havn’t added to my diary for some time now, but I have still been experiencing the Revival of God and am advancing in the Lord. Scripture memorization has been a very important part of my discipline.  I have memorized Romans ch 8.  Hebrews ch 12, Psalm 91, and now I am memorizing the book of 1 John.  Recently I have become aware that I have a new passion and love for God’s word.  In all my forty years as a Christian and  as a pastor I have not really loved Gods word.  I have loved theology and philosophy and preaching instead. I read the Bible primarily to find material for sermons.  This morning, I asked God to speak to me ( something I do often now ) and He directed me to Psalm 119.  I have always avoided Psalm 119 because of its repetitiousness  and length.  I confess that in the past I found Psalm 119 too tedius for words.  Today I enjoyed it and read it a second time and readily received what the Lord was saying to me thru it.   And I am experiencing the same beauty of God’s word, as I memorize 1 John though  it too is very repetitious. I am beginning to understand that in that repetition is the wisdom of God.

I am more and more convinced that the Lord has set me apart for a season of preparation,  to prepare for revival and that this season will be all too short and i need to be wise in the way I use this time.  More than anything I want to have much scripture memorized so that i will be much more effective in ministry.  I am making significant advances in prayer also , particularly in the area of intercession. I am learning how to let the Lord guide me. It is as if He takes me in the Spirit to the person or place I need to intercede for and He keeps me there until He assures me that I have completed my task in prayer.  An hour spent this way passes very quickly.   In fact i am finding that my biggest temptation is the  urge to pray. Many times when I ought to be attending to chores I find cannot pull myself away from prayer.. This is so very unlike me. I have never been anything like this ever before. Always prayer was the chore, and twenty minutes was about all I could endure.   Surely the law of the spirit of life has indeed set me free from the law of sin and death.

Jan 28

This has been a quiet day of online research.  I am finding myself struggling between the extremes of revival theology and practice that are being promoted in the world. . On the one hand is the world of John Wimber and John Paul Jackson,  and Bethel church and the Toronto Vineyard ” blessing” and Brad Jersak, and on the other hands are the views of people like the blogger McKala who is came out of that  world and now is quite critical of it and quite biblically so. She writes with great authority.  I am influenced by the  A Wimber Way. if I might be allowed to pun on the chorus of the song  The Lion Sleeps Tonight.   I have many friends in that world, members of the men’s group I belong to. But I have never  felt truly comfortable with it.  My spirit does not bear witness with it, though I have not had solid proofs or reasons to refute it.  It just was something I did not feel led to join. I love the men, I don’t love their theology.  I have been reading articles by Al Houghton about praying the justice of God, and that is resonating with me.  He writes that for 70 years the church has not used prayer offensively and that corresponds very closely with my contention that the notion of Christendom died about 70 years ago, and with the death of Christendom , the sense of  responsibility, of duty,  to fight for Christian justice on an national and international level  also died.  I will be meeting him soon, and hearing  him lecture which is quite exciting. Somewhere between,   between the anticharismatic  rejection of The Holy Spirit gifts, and the extremes of A Wimber Way, is where I want to set up camp. Where that is exactly I am still not quite sure.

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